Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time movie review

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

Ok it’s been quite a while but a new movie based on a video game has finally come out, and it’s a big one. Can the team that turned a 20 minute theme park ride into three feature length movies make what could possibly be the best video game adaptation of all time? Well read on and find out. Also this may contain some spoilers.

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time is about Prince Dastan who is framed for his father’s murder. During the movie the prince must uncover the true villain while dealing with the Persian army, Persian ninjas, a deceptive princess and desert bandits.

This movie has a lot of advantages that other video game movies don’t. It has a huge budget, three a-list actors, and an experienced production crew. But can all these things really help. Well I say yes. The plots to the movie and the game are almost completely different. In the game the Prince accidently releases the sands of time and sets off to undue his mistake. While the movie focuses on Dastan trying to prevent the sands from being released. Does this work against the movie? Not in my opinion.

Prince of Persia is the prime example of a game that’s plot would not work well in a movie. In the game there are only four characters. One dies, one is the villain and the other two aren’t always on screen at the same time. So instead of making a scene for scene adaptation the movie takes a few things from the game and the basic plot and expanded upon it making it its own entity.

I just mentioned the lack of characters in the game so what does the movie give us? Well instead of just one prince we get three. Dastan has two brothers while in the game he is an only child. Another change taken is that Dastan isn’t even the king’s natural born son. At the beginning of the movie he’s an orphan boy who is adopted by the king. In place of the Vizier we get the kings brother Nizam. Farah’s Character is present in Tamina and the only difference from the game is her name and the city she is from.

The relationship between Dastan and Tamina is very accurate to how it is in the game. They are untrusting of each other and not very happy about being forced to work together and bicker constantly. There is one scene where like in the games there is a gate separating them and Tamina has to pull a lever to open it. But unlike in the games she refuses and Dastan has to open it himself.

The most prominent element from the game is also in the movie. Dastan’s acrobatic skills and Parkour like maneuvers are used a lot in the game for puzzle solving and in the movie in almost every action scene. Right at the beginning of the movie even as a child Dastan is climbing walls and hoping from roof to roof, though they do have him make a few mistakes as he has not perfected his skills. Later in the movie a lot of the sets are similar to parts in the third game when you’re outside.

Other things we get from the game are the time dagger of course, and like in the game it has limited usage but unlike in the game it’s not easy to refill. Dastan’s armor is very similar to the armor in the second game and he also duel wields swords like in the second game. When the prince uses the dagger the effect they use is very similar to the third game when the prince is infected with the sands.

I thought the acting was fantastic I felt connected to the characters and was genuinely concerned during the scenes they were in trouble. Gemma Arterton is beautiful as Tamina and does a great job of portraying a strong independent woman. Sir Ben Kingsley plays a great villain as always. Alfred Molina is very funny as a sort of comic relief and his character complains about taxes a lot which I thought was funny considering the recent events with the tea party.

Jake Gyllenhaal is fantastic as the prince. His attitude and mannerisms are spot on also he really buffed up for the role. This is the first really action heavy movie I have seen him in and he was great very quick and natural with the swords and I hope they green light a full trilogy.

How would I do it? Only thing I can think of to change is I would shorten the time Dastan and Tamina spend in the desert to allow for more exploration scenes in the tunnels leading to where the sands of time are so that you could see Dastan avoiding traps like in the games.

Overall the movie is entertaining and very enjoyable to a whole range of movie goers. Anyone from adults to nine year olds can enjoy this movie and there is enough of the game in there to make it feel like Prince of Persia. There will no doubt be hardcore fans of the game series who will find something to complain about but that will always be true as long as there are movie adaptations. Now on to the scores.

Overall the movie gets 8 out of 10 grains of sand. Is it the most accurate video game movie of all time? No. is it the most entertaining and enjoyable video game movie of all time? Yes.

The acting gets 9 out of 10. I thought Dastan and Tamina played really well off of each other and Ben Kingsley’s version of the Vizier is better than the one in the game in my opinion.

The plot gets 6 out of 10. Don’t get me wrong I loved the story and a direct retelling of the first game would not have worked but this score is based on how close a movie’s plot resembles the game it’s based on.

Content gets 8 out of 10. Some characters have changed roles or names but it’s obvious which ones from the game they are based on. The sets, weapons and outfits all resemble ones from the game and the most important piece, the time dagger, is in it as well.

That does it. This review marks my first attempt at editing myself. I have some decent ideas in my opinion but I’m not the best editor and that was the major complaint I got on my other reviews. Up next is my review of the Megaman fan film should have that within a few days. That will be followed by Tekken or Art of Fighting whichever one I can get my hands on first.

Call of Duty: Frozen Crossing

Modern Warfare: Frozen Crossing

So I’m still waiting for the next movie based on a video game to come out. But for the time being I have found this fan made Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 movie. Now it’s only 7 minutes long but it’s still based on a video game and I’m bored. So let’s dig in.

The plot focuses on Soap and Ghost now with new call signs Dust and Specter. Their mission is to rescue a captured operative. Along the way the duo deal with enemies soldiers and a very well armed sniper.

So being fan made I’m not surprised at how close to the game this short film is. The way Dust and Specter interact and even their dialog feel like they were taken right out of the game. For costing only about two hundred dollars the special effects and props look very good. If I had to guess id the say the weapons are air soft guns but I’m not positive.

In the short running time of the film the relationship between Specter and Dust and both characters personalities are developed very well. You get to see how impatient Dust is and how calculated Specter is. Later their high level of skill and teamwork are shown when they run from the Russian soldiers.

The direction and editing are amazing and the overall film quality is fantastic much better than most straight to DVD movies and if feature length then you wouldn’t even know it was filmed for under two hundred dollars.

The weapons look like the ones from the game and Specter even calls in a predator missile at the end and if you got really nerdy you could probably name perks each character was using. There is also a mission over view intro screen just like in the games and Specter/Ghost has his trade mark mask with the skull.
After reading tons of comments on the video I found only two that kept coming up.

The first was that a lot of people felt the sniping was inaccurate because the bullet should hit before it makes a sound sense the round is supersonic. To that I say oh well even the big budget action movies make mistakes like that and a lot worse ones like how many bullets come in a clip.

The second was comments about Dust eating snow at the end. Some people thought that it was to show his fun loving nature but I’ve herd two other tactical reasons. The first is because he’s thirsty and the snow will melt into water. This makes sense because specter says right after don’t you have a canteen. The second is because he was running and doesn’t have a face covering like Specter he’s eating it to lower his temperature so he doesn’t breathe steam.

Overall it’s very fun to watch and there is a promise of a second part at the end which I can’t wait for. I won’t do scores because I’ll just end up repeating myself but it gets a 10 in every category easy. If Hollywood made adaptations like this then fans would rarely be disappointed. Well if you don’t believe me here’s the YouTube link so you can judge for yourself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYC6i9Xod40&feature=fvst

Uwe Boll

Uwe Boll
Retarded Idiot or Mad Genius

This is a project I have been wanting to do for awhile I’m here today to review Uwe Boll not a movie but the man himself I’d like to look at his film works and see if he is really as bad as people say he is. At the time of writing I have already reviewed all his movies based on video game so you can look those up if you’re curious what I thought of his movies.

Boll was born June 22nd 1965 in Germany and believe it or not he did go to college. We have Marlon Brando to blame for getting Boll interested in movies because it was after seeing the film Mutiny on the Bounty Boll decided to go into film making at the tender age of 10.

His movies have not always been video game adaptations though his first two American releases where horror and drama respectfully. Both of which got decent reviews believe it or not. In between his last few videogame movies he made a couple of original films as well. The first being Seed a horror movie about a man who kills a lot of people and then caught and sentenced to death. However to avoid having to release him on a state law that says if the person doesn’t die with three shocks from the electric chair they have to be set free. The police bury seed alive. Of course seed gets out of the grave and hunts down everyone that did wrong to him.

The second movie is Tunnel Rats a drama about a group of U.S. soldiers and Viet Cong soldiers who are fighting each other in a series of underground tunnels. Seed got ok reviews but Tunnel Rats got really decent reviews at least from unbiased people. I honestly think that some critics both at home and professional will automatically call a Boll movie bad just because his name is on it and truthfully that’s not fair.
I mean if I didn’t watch Postal just because Boll did it then I would have missed a hilarious movie. Which brings me to my next point I think it’s possible that Boll’s video game movies may have just been jokes. No no hear me out. There are so many mistakes so many plot holes such stupid dialog how could it be anything but a joke.

Ok here’s one of my favorite lines from House of the Dead. The main bad guy has one of the humans on the table and has just finished explaining his evil plot and the human says “you wanted to become immortal but why?” and the genius writers have the bad guy respond with “to live forever” I mean come on if that’s not comedy that I think Boll may have a brain tumor. In the same movie we get a flashback scene that flashes back every event in the movie.

It’s things like this that make me believe that the video game movies have to be a joke because they are so horrible but all his original work is at the very least decent. It’s not the best but then again it is all indie work as he funds his own movies so you can’t expect much. (and no I’m not saying indie movies are bad I’m just saying that most of the time they are not the best with that rare movie making it big like Donnie Darko, Clerks, Evil Dead, and so on,)

So again I state that just because his name is on something don’t immediately judge it as bad. I challenge anyone who is a fan of movies to find an original Boll movie not one based on a video game and watch it unbiased you might be surprised.
Putting aside his directing and writing abilities let’s talk about Boll as a person for a second. I think generally he is an ok guy and pretty funny too. When postal came out Boll released a video of himself saying that directors like Michael Bay and Eli Roth where idiots and didn’t know anything about making movies. Obviously a joke and a very funny one at that, when postal came out he also claimed that it would beat the fourth Indiana Jones at the box office again another joke.

One event involving Boll is hilarious in its own right. He challenged 5 of his harshest critics to a boxing match each fight lasting ten rounds. Boll beat them all, and afterwards stated that he now likes the critics for having guts. One other thing Boll has done which I think is pretty interesting is in two of his films, Tunnel Rats and Stoic really didn’t have scripts and the actors where pretty much improvising their lines. This shows great talent on Bolls part for being able to direct the actor’s emotions and even more talent on the actor’s parts for being able to come up with dialog on the spot.

He has a couple movies coming up soon that I am genuinely interested in seeing. The first is called Rampage it’s about a guy who gets fed up with society makes a body suit out of Kevlar and goes on a “rampage” killing lots and lots of people kind of like Natural Born Killers or Falling Down. The second is called Zombie Massacre and it looks to be a funny over the top zombie movie and with Boll displaying skills in comedy I have high hopes.

So all in all is Boll the next Ed Wood? Maybe but Ed’s movies are only popular because of how absolutely bad and ridicules they are and while Bolls video game movies fit this description his original movies are not all bad and have actually won indie film awards including best director.

So like my other reviews let’s give Mr. Boll a score I say as a director he gets 5 out of 10. He is nowhere near the greatest director ever but as an indie director he’s certainly not the worst. So next time your cruising the new release shelf and you see a movie with the words “An Uwe Boll film” then pick it up make sure it’s not based on a video game and give it a shot.

OneeChanbara

OneeChanbara

Well it seems as if all the movies I was waiting for keep getting delayed and instead I keep finding these obscure video game adaptation movies that no one has heard of or cares about and today is no exception as I review the OneeChanbara movie and its sequel. Although it’s more of standalone movie then a sequel but well get into that later. You probably have never heard of the game or the movie with the same title but without further ado let’s take a look at OneeChanbara the movie and OneeChanbara the movie vortex.

In both movies the world is infested by zombies that are the result of none other than an evil corporation experimenting with prolonging life. In the first movie the story follows Aya a zombie hunter that’s looking for her sister who killed her parents. The second movie follows Aya and her younger sister Saki as they hunt down zombies trying to find a way to get the world back to normal.

Now before we get to the meat of this review I need to give you a bit of background on the games. The OneeChanbara games are cult games in Japan two of which have made it over to our side of the world, one on Xbox 360 and one on Wii. In the games you play as one of two sisters fighting through hordes of zombies what’s the big deal you ask well as most things Japanese the games characters are scantily clad. The storyline explanation for this is that when the sisters are covered in blood they become extra powerful. So they have to where very little clothes to get as much of their skin covered in blood as possible.

Wow that sounds hot your saying. Well hold on to your pants there mister its true it does have a campy attraction to it much like dead or alive extreme beach volleyball had bouncing ladies and physic defining breasts. However where as D.O.A. EBV was a solid volley ball title with smooth controls and addicting game play the OneeChanbara game I played was glitchy and frustrating at best and no amount of bikini wearing zombie killing hotties could help it.

So how do the movies stack up? Well about as well as the game. The movies do an ok job of capturing the crazy zombie killing hack and slash action that makes up the meat of the games but they fall short in just about every other department. The first movies action is a bit better choreographed then the second and the acting is much better too but they both have their ups and downs.

The second movie is closer to the games story line as far as I could tell as the one game I played is actually like the 5th in the series so we poor Americans get very little of the back story. But from the little bit of info I could dig up originally Aya’s sister Saki is being controlled by the evil D3 corporation witch is actually the name of the game developer. And eventually Aya gets her back to normal but in the movie Saki is just a bitch and doing everything of her own free will and eventually Aya ends up fighting and killing her. Then in the second movie she’s alive again without any explanation and they are working together and instead of Saki having killed their parents it’s now the evil corporations doing.

Now in the game there’s two important meters aside from the health meter. There is the blood fury meter which determines how much blood the player is covered in when it fills they enter blood fury mode where they become stronger but also take more damage and the gore meter which shows how much blood the players weapon is covered in if they don’t clean the weapon then it losses strength and begins to get stuck in enemies.

Each movie has scenes that represent one of these meters but never both. The first movie has a scene where Aya is fighting a huge group of zombies and after about half of them her sword gets stuck and then throughout the movie she is cleaning the blood off by flicking the sword samurai style. And in the second movie a good part of it is focused on the blood fury mode.

As far as characters and content from the game both movies have some about as much as you would expect from a video game adaptation. The main sisters are both in the movie although there relationship with each other is only correct in the second one. Reiko is another character form the games but in the first movie she is a good guy where as in the game she is a villain and for some reason she is the only character that really carries over from the first movie to the second yeah the sisters do but there whole back story is changed.

The main villain from the second game is also in the second movie. Himiko however at first she uses the name Misery which is actually the name of her clone but her character actually translates pretty well onto the big screen and she has a pretty decent evil psychopathic laugh I enjoyed.

So what’s a movie based on a hack and slash video game without hack and slashing? No it’s not in the name of the king where done with Uwe Boll. Anyway the action for the first one is a lot better then what you get in the second movie. In the first one the actors move quickly there’s decent wire work and there’s even a few special moves from the game like in the opening scene where Aya charges her attack and then spins around to take out surrounding zombies.

The final battle of the last movie is also a lot more epic and awesome then the second. it involves Aya and Saki both unlocking some kind of hidden potential that allows them to fight like anime characters by flying around causing explosions moving so fast it seems like teleportation in comparison the final battle of the second movie between Himiko and Aya is very very slow with bad editing and crappy wire work.

In the second movies final battle there’s a scene where both Himiko and Aya use their weapons to lightly touch the ground then spring back up but you can easily tell it’s someone simply touching the swords to the ground then cutting back to the fighting.

Both movies have things that make them seem very silly and campy and sometimes are annoying. One constant is Aya’s rose tattoo is clearly a rub on and is often peeling throughout the movie. In the first movie Reiko never reloads once and it seems as if she has infinite ammo. This is very weird considering the fact her gun is a double barrel sawed off shotgun.

The second movie uses a very annoying blood splatter effect that covers the camera in every single last action scene now while this is a feature present in the game it’s still annoying maybe the first time as fan service sure but it’s annoying here it’s annoying in the game its annoying in call of duty modern warfare 2 and should just be gotten rid of all together.

The acting all around is pretty bad and again very cheesy but not in a good way. The plots follow the games plots as well as a crazy Japanese cult game can be followed I mentioned before that they screwed up Saki in the first movie but besides that it’s as good as can be expected.

How would I do it? Well I wouldn’t have I know it’s a copout but it’s true the games where not good enough to warrant a movie hell the games aren’t even good enough to warrant games

Overall the first one is worth a watch if you absolutely have to the second is not good for anything at all. I found these on the internet not sure if they have an American release yet but I’m sure if you really wanted to you could find them at an import store. Now on to the scores

Overall the movies get 3 out of 10 bikini wearing zombie hunters. The first one has some ok action second one is not worth a glance

The acting gets 3 out of 10. Even though it’s subtitled you can still tell the actors are not very good at all

The content gets 5 out of 10. Spread between the two movies we get recognizable characters villains and special moves but n to much else.

The plot gets 4 out of 10. The second movie is closer to the game then the first but the first is more enjoyable by far.

Well here we are again at the end of another movie I didn’t know I would be reviewing. Tekken obviously did not come out on time but I have seen a trailer and it looks great the art of fighting however looks absolutely ridicules but I guess we will see. Prince of Persia does look fantastic though and I’m hoping all 3 of those will be out before the end of the year so I can include them in vol.2 as of right now this is only the second review in vol.2 .

Top ten movies you dident know where based on comics

Top Ten Movies You Didn’t Know Where Based on Comics

So it’s been awhile since I’ve done a top ten list so I’m back with the top ten movies you didn’t know where based on comics. Before we get started I need to clarify the list is movies that normal movie goers didn’t know where based on a comic book, the placement of the movies on the list has nothing to do with how good the movie was just how little people may actually know it was a comic. Disclaimer: if you are a fan of comic books you most likely know all these where based on comics. Ok now with all that out of the way let’s get started.

10. A History of Violence. The comic was written by John Wagner and published by vertigo. The movie of the same name was directed by David Cronenberg. The only reason this movie isn’t higher on the list is the fact that the DVD had a sticker on it that said “based on the graphic novel” so that kind of gives it away but there are still a ton of people out there who saw the movie and don’t know there’s a graphic novel out there it’s based on.

Both the movie and the comic are about a man who owns a diner, one night he fights off a couple of robbers and gets on the news then mobsters show up and claim they know the diner owner, the owner denies this and the next series of events throws his life into a tailspin. I’ve never read the comic but the movie is great through my research I’ve found the first half of the movie is very much like the comic while the second half takes quite a few liberties. Since I haven’t read the comic I can’t give an honest opinion but I would highly recommend the movie.

9. The Surrogates. The comic was written by Robert Venditti and published by Top Shelf, the movie with the same name but dropping the “the” was directed by Jonathan Mostow. This is a newer movie whose DVD is not out at the time of writing which is why it’s only at number 9. At the end of the preview it mentions it’s based on a comic but not sure how many people where paying attention or even bothered to follow up on it.

The plot to both the comic and the movie take place in the future although the comic and movie have different dates, 2054 and 2017 respectfully. While there are a few changes the comic and movie follow the same basic plot order and cover the same events and the overall ending is the same with one minor difference. I enjoyed both the comic and the movie and would easily recommend both.

8. Wanted. The comic was written by Mark Millar and published by Top Cow, the movie of the same name was directed by (god help me spell this right) Timur Bekmambetov. This is one even comic fans may not know because of how crazy different the movie and comic are at first it seems only the title and a few character names are the same.

The plot at its very basic core is the same a loser kid finds out his dad was killed and now he’s part of a secret society and has special abilities. But after that they are amazingly different in the movie its assassins and in the comic its supervillans and the differences don’t stop there. I won’t get into too much detail but I do recommend both the comic and the movie although they are nothing alike they are both great in their own right.

7. Swamp Thing. The comic was written by Len Wein, the movie also with the same name was directed by horror master Wes Craven. It’s an older movie with more of a cult following than anything else, there was also a cartoon series but I remember that being more like captain planet than anything else. A tiny bit of trivia for you fans not in the know about comics Wein also co-created the characters Wolverine, Storm, Nightcrawler and Colossus.

The first movie is the origin story of our hero and does a pretty good job of following the comic’s story the action is good the effects for the time look pretty good and of course the direction is good. Basically a doctor is in a lab accident and becomes the swamp thing who then fights to protect the swamp and the people inside mainly against an evil doctor who wants immortality. I haven’t read any of the comics but the movie was pretty good for its time and if you’re curious enough then it maybe fun to read the comics.

6. Aliens vs. Predator. The original comic was written by Randy Stradley and published by Dark Horse, and the first movie was directed by Paul W.S. Anderson and the second by the Strause brothers. While it’s true that the alien and predator movies where movies first the first time that the two races fought each other was in the pages of the comic. The first comic came out right before predator 2 and in predator 2 you can see an alien skull in the predator’s ship.

The plot to the first comic is very similar to the movie however in the comic the events take place in the future and on another planet while in the movie its present day earth. But they both follow the same formula where an unsuspecting planet and group of people is exposed to the predators hunting practice and eventually one of the humans joins up with a predator. Not sure if there is a comic with similar events to the second movie but it’s got more action except this time it’s a lone predator that’s higher ranked then the others. Both the comics and movies are good, the comic has a bit more plot development but the movies are fun mindless entertainment.

5. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The comic was written by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird and published under Mirage. The first movie (the only one I’m covering) was directed by Steve Barron. Now a lot and I do mean a lot of people know there is a cartoon but very few people know there’s a comic. And the first movie is based more on the comic then the cartoon. Whereas the cartoon was very kid friendly the comic was very dark and violent and the first move does a great job of combining both.

There are a few differences from the comic and the movie and I blame these on the cartoon such as April being a news reporter where as in the comic she’s a research assistant in a lab. However if they had her being a lab assistant then they would have to do the mouser story line and the special effects where not good enough back then to do it justice. If you have never read a TMNT comic before and you are a fan you owe it to yourself to find one and read it and of course the movie is a fun guilty little pleasure.

4. Mystery Men. The Flaming Carrot comics the movie is based on are written by Bob Burden and published by several different publishers currently Image. The movie Mystery Men was directed by Kinka Usher. Now the comic is officially about the Flaming Carrot however the carrot is responsible for forming the group Mystery Men. The movie is loosely based on the comics but with the exception of Captain Amazing and Invisible Boy every hero has made an appearance in the comic.

I have never read a Flaming Carrot comic but from what I can gather the movie follows the comics theme of parodying super heroes. I’ve heard great things about the comic and I know for a fact that the movie is very very funny so if you’re in the mood for something lighter and more hilarious then most comics or comic book movies check out the Flaming Carrot and Mystery Men

3. Bulletproof Monk. The comic is written by Michael Avon Oeming, and the movie was directed by Paul Hunter. So no matter how hard I tried I could not find any info on the comic. I was able to find a few pieces of cover art but that’s it I don’t know the plot and the only character name I could find was that of Chow Yun-Fat’s character the nameless monk.

I can only assume that like with a lot of comic book movies the movie is similar in ways to its source material but also a lot different in places the fight scenes in the movie are pretty good if you’re not fed up with the whole wire-fu thing other than that if you find a Bulletproof Monk comic give it a read and let me know how it is.

2. Men in Black. The comic is written by Lowell Cunningham and was originally published by Aircel comics then Malibu and lastly Marvel, the movies where directed by Barry Sonnenfeld. This is another comic book movie that simply takes the basic plot and characters of the comic and reshapes them. Zed Kay and Jay are all in the comic however the tone of the comic is more adult and grittier then the movies.

In the comic the Men in Black handle all kinds of paranormal activity besides aliens such as demons, and mutants. Also in the comic instead of memory erasure the MiB agents will just kill witnesses and the last difference is that instead of maintaining peace and balance on earth the MiB help shape the world in the way they see fit.

1. The Mask. The comic was originally written by John Arcudi and published by Dark Horse. The movie was directed by Chuck Russell. Now who would have thought that the hilarious Jim Carey movie would be based on an ultra violent comic, well not me that’s for sure. But it is and like men in black the movie substitutes violence for comedy.

In the comic the mask turns the person wearing it into an ultra violet antihero. In the movie the mask is only as violent as the person wearing it. An example is in the movie when Stanly gets revenge on the mechanics he only hurts them physically and in a comedic way but in the comic he kills them. I would very highly recommend both the comic and the movie. The movie is Jim Carey before his act became repetitive and annoying and the comic is ultra violent dark comedy goodness.

Well friends that concludes the top ten movies you didn’t know where based on comic books. I hope you enjoyed it and if you’re not a comic fan I hope this list inspired you to go pick up a graphic novel or two.

P.S. if any of the info I put about the comics is incorrect please let me know so I can correct it

Alone in the Dark2 movie review

Alone in the Dark 2

Welcome back! I thought I’d be waiting until the Tekken movie came out to be starting vol.2 of my video game movie review series but alas the internet gods have smiled upon me and led me to a copy of Alone in the Dark 2. Now for those of you who have read my reviews before thank you and welcome back. For those of you who are new each review follows a simple format. Introduction, quick plot summary, review, the how I would do it section where I describe briefly how I would change the movie to make it better and finally the ratings which are broken down into the following categories
• Overall. My overall score for the movie out of 10
• Acting. How well the actors did their job including if they matched the characters persona from the game.
• Plot. How much the plot of the movie resembles a plot from the game(s)
• Content. How much stuff from the game is in the movie including weapons, characters, outfits and other familiar things from the game.

This will be the only review with this long of an introduction if you’re curious and want to read my other reviews you can search through the blogs here or go to my site http://vidgamemoviereview.blogspot.com/ so with that shameful plug out of the way let’s get on to the review.

Well I said that Far Cry was the last Uwe Boll movie so by now your probably shouting liar as loud as you can at your computer screen while your mother/ neighbor yells at you to shut up. Well to you I say hold your god damn horses this movie was only produced by Boll it was written and directed by two other schmucks. Will that coupled with a whole new cast help the sequel surpass its predecessor read on to find out.

Alone in the Dark 2 follows the main character from the games and previous film Edward Carnby as he helps a group of people hunt and kill an evil witch. Along the way Edward gets infected with a witch’s curse and has to find out how to break the spell before him and his friends are all killed.

Ok so for this review since the movie has so very little to do with the game we are going to play how does it compare? Where we compare the sequel to the original movie and see how it stacks up. So to get it out of the way the only thing from the game in this movie is Edward and the fact that the plot focuses on paranormal activity.

This brings us to our first comparison. Whereas Boll’s movie had multiple characters, monsters and plot elements from the game the sequel had only the main character. And they even cast him incorrectly as in the games and first movie Edward is a white guy in the sequel they hired an Asian actor.

Now I have no problem with changing the race of a character like when they made kingpin black in the daredevil movie but to change the race in between movies is crazy. Also the sequel seems to completely disregard the events of the first one. At the end of the first one New York had been completely overrun with the monsters and everyone was either eaten or evacuated but at the start of this movie everyone’s walking around happy go lucky not a care in the world.

Now let’s discuss the action. In the first movie there was a few wire fight moves and one bullet time scene the rest was generic shootouts and explosions witch made for a generic but entertaining movie. The sequel however as far as action is concerned consists of shouting and firing tracer rounds at a mist where the bullets do nothing and believe it or not is pretty boring.

How about monsters surely a witch with supernatural powers was cooler then a bunch of lizard like monsters and Spiderman like zombies. Well you would be wrong. In the first movie there was two enemy types the first where super strong and agile humans infected with some sort of spinal symbiote the second where giant black lizard type things that ate everything in its path silly as they may be at least you knew what they where and what hurt them in the context of the movie.

In the sequel they constantly refer to the one monster that there is as a witch. But the monster itself acts more like a ghost as most of the time it appears as mist and can also posses people. And as far as hurting it the humans shoot at it the whole movie and that does nothing there is one point where they turn on UV lights witch does nothing but confuse me as I’ve never heard of ultra violet hurting ghosts or witches.

So monsters action and plot all three are better in Boll’s movie but the writing has to be better right? I mean Boll is an idiot who knows nothing of video games. Unfortunately you’re wrong again. A lot of people complain about the long text intro in the first one but at least it gives you info about the monsters that make the movie a little easier to follow. In the sequel they don’t really explain anything.

The dialog is about the same for both but for as many plot holes that are in the first one the second one has twice as many. There is a scene in the second one where Edward is infected with a curse and the stereotypical large muscle bound shoot first guy is watching over him one second and the next just so the movie can show us a useless scene he’s gone and conveniently left behind his shotgun. Then as Edward heads downstairs the afore mentioned muscle head is suddenly not on the porch.

And finally the acting well I’ve never seen the problem with Christian Slater so besides the writing I thought the acting in the first movie was bearable. In this movie we have 3 decent actors 2 of which die. The first is Rick Yune who has been in the fast and the furious, a bond villain in die another day, an assassin in a straight to DVD action flick and will be the main character in the upcoming epic ninja assassin.

The second is Danny Trejo who was in both Desperado and once upon a time in Mexico and plenty of other movies as supporting and main cast. And the third is Zach Ward who is mainly known for his role on the sitcom Titus but has also been in 2 other Boll movies.

All three of these actors have shown great acting ability and unfortunately the writing simply does not allow them to show off. They have Edward played by Rick Yune as a street wise tuff guy and it’s just silly. Zach Ward plays a drug hustler who is infected with the witch’s curse and frankly has the best lines. And Danny Trejo has like two lines then is killed which is a waste.

Lance Henriksen is also in the movie and you may be surprised but if you browse the new release wall as much as I do you can see how many straight to DVD b-sci-fi and horror movies he’s been in.

How would I do it? Well frankly I wouldn’t have made a sequel but if I had to I would have picked up with the plot from the first one and explained what happened to the monsters and everyone else.

Well that about wraps it up overall this movie is a piece of crap that I think even
Uwe Boll should be ashamed to have his name attached to and just goes to show you that there is something worse than having Boll make a video game movie.

Overall I give the movie 2 out of 10 Asian Carnbys. There is almost nothing enjoyable about this movie and honestly not even worth watching for free.

The acting gets 3 out of 10. With 3 decent actors on the cast they could have had so much more but they were written very badly.

The plot gets 2 out of 10. Besides it being about paranormal activity there is nothing to link it to a game.

The content gets 1 out of 10. Only thing from the game was Edward and a flash light.

Ok well that does it for the first entry in Vol.2 of my review series. I’m still eagerly awaiting Tekken and recently I saw some production Photos from the Prince of Persia movie and it looks promising.

Street Fighter: The Legend if Chun-LI movie review

Street Fighter
The Legend of Chun-Li

So 15 years after the original live action street fighter they decided to give it another shot. This time however instead of trying to cram as many characters into the movie they decided to focus on one specific character and try to get a bit more back story into the movie. How did it work? Read on to find out.

The plot focuses on Chun-Li a girl whose father was taken when she was a little girl who grows up and decides to fight for the people who are being treated unfairly. Along her journey she is trained by a martial arts master has run-ins with Interpol, street gangs and more.

Where to begin? Well ill start by saying I like the choice of actors and actresses I’m a big fan of Smallville and have liked Kristin Kreuk for awhile plus she is half Chinese just like the movies intrepatation of Chun-Li. The guy that played Bison also is a good actor although for some reason the movie felt they had to make him Scottish. Robin Shu was great as Gen although at points I found it hard to detach myself from the fact he also played Liu Kang in the mortal Kombat movie.

Michael Clark Duncan was a perfect choice for Balrog and played the part well. As far as Vega goes I can’t really comment there was no real acting per say. I’m not sure Vega had any lines except maybe a few one word sentences or classic comments like “my face”. What really upset me about Vega is that in both the anime movie and the anime series of street fighter Vega becomes obsessed with Chun-Li and beating her and smelling her hair for some reason. Now Vega does get a chunk of her hair at one point but I thought that Chun-Li beat him way to quick and the movie missed a great opportunity.

A character I could have done without was the addition of Charlie Nash. Now I like Charlie in the game but the movie completely ruins him instead of making him a badass member of the air force he becomes a wise cracking half retarded member of Interpol and just like Arnold in batman and robin most of his lines consist of one liners or innuendos. His female counterpart is no better and they feel more like comic relief then anything and if they just made Charlie a new character instead of trying to fit another game character in it would have been less upsetting.

Now what’s a movie based on a fighting game without fights and specials moves? Nothing so let’s talk about that. The fight chorography was decent not the worst thing certainly nowhere near Jet-Li caliber fight scenes but they where entertaining enough although sadly the most entertaining was at the beginning of the movie when Chun-Li's father was fighting off Bison's thugs. And how about special moves well Chun-Li uses the spinning bird kick which is heavily foreshadowed early on when her father gives her a spinning bird necklace.

What confuses me is how they handled Bison's powers and let me explain a little. In the game Bison has the ability to control what he calls psycho energy allowing him to levitate teleport and charge his fists and feet with energy making his attacks stronger and sometimes he mixes the two like in his psycho crusher special move where he flies across the screen spinning with his hands charged with psycho energy.
I bring this up because Chun-Li also has an energy attack in the game it’s a slow moving version of the Hado-Ken or a bigger ball of energy that is stationary in her hands called the Kikouken and Kikousho respectively. In the movie gen teaches her a projectile energy attack witch works well however they completely ignore Bison’s energy abilities witch confuses me. Why would they show Chun-Li’s energy attack but not Bison’s?

They did not completely ignore Bison's ability usually when he shows up in a room people react as if he just appeared and there is always a gust of wind witch I believe is meant to represent his teleport ability and later when he is fighting gen and Chun-Li whenever he delivers a really strong kick or punch a whoosh sound effect can be heard witch I believe is meant to represent the psycho energy.

Now while his powers may be obscurely represented and his origin is kind of jumbled they did get his attitude correct when his assistant gives up information to Chun-Li the next scene bison is punching what seems like a heavy bag but it turns out to be his assistant who he just finished punching to death.

Chun-Li has her hair in the twin buns a few times as a throwback to fans and her famous dress makes a quick appearance gen dresses like he does in the game Balrog doesn’t have boxing gloves but that makes sense because he’s not boxing anyone. Vega has his trade mark claw and mask but bison dresses as a business man but that also makes sense because that’s what he is and this is an origin story.

One thing that confuses me a bit is they seem to kill off Bison Chun-Li hits him with an energy blast then twists his head all the way around and that’s the last we see of him but then right before the credits gen shows Chun-Li a flyer for a street fighter competition and he hints bison has set it up then tells her he’s going to Japan to recruit Ryu which is neat. Now I’m all for fake deaths like when a bad guy falls off a cliff then the next movie it turns out he didn’t die but I’m not sure how anyone could recover from having their head twisted around but it’s a movie so I suppose we will see.

The producers have said that if this movie does well enough they will follow up with a Ryu and ken movie and we all know that’s what we really want to see. And with the set up for an actual tournament I believe if they do make a Ryu and ken movie we may actually see planed fights in a tournament style which has yet to be done in either street fighter movie.

So let’s see we have got the characters, the actors, the costumes and the special moves covered what’s left oh yeah the story. Well what can I say the basic plots of Chun-Li's back story are there with bison killing her father. She isn’t in Interpol in this one but she does help them out so maybe in future movies. Besides that it’s just a reason for the fights to happen and I think Bison’s back story could have used a bit more work.

How would I do it? Well honestly id change bison to be a bit more like his game counterpart and at one point I would have had Chun-Li use some sort of rapid kick maneuver to represent her lightning kick witch I think is a bit more famous then her spinning bird kick which she did use in the movie.

Overall the action is decent I have heard some people say that the original is more enjoyable and I suppose that’s true in a campy sort of way where as the original movie was funny in its campiness the new ones campy parts are not so funny just annoying however it is a more serious street fighter movie and I think captures the feel of the games a bit better.

Overall I give Chun-Li 6 out of 10 Kikoukens. The action was pretty good and focusing on one main character rather than many was a good move but I still think that they should have done a Ryu and ken movie first.

The acting gets 3 out of 10. Chun-Li, Gen, and Bison where the only real decent acting jobs here Chris Kline and Moon Bloodgood had horrible horrible dialog and where not needed at all for this movie.

The content gets 6 out of 10. There was a good amount of characters without there being an over abundance most of which acted like their game counter parts and there was a decent amount of special moves.

The plot gets 4 out of 10. Chun-Li's story was ok but the other major character Bison they completely ruined making him Scottish but raised in Thailand I mean even the instruction manual says he’s Thai but oh well at least his attitude was correct.

Ok well that’s it it’s been months and months but we have reached the end of vol.1. Vol.2 will start with Tekken in October and end with the last video game movie of 2010. And 2010 will be a big year for video game movies we have prince of Persia, king of fighters, Blood Rayne 3 (ugh), clock tower, possibly a new mortal Kombat and a new resident evil I believe Tekken is the last of this year.

Vol.2 will also mark the start of in theater reviews which means I will be trying to see all of these in the theater and review them immediately instead of DVD now I can’t promise I will be able to make it to all of them but I will do my best. In between Tekken and the start of the 2010 movies I have planned to write a review on Uwe Boll himself so that will be fun and maybe another top ten list.

Max Payne review

Max Payne

Ok well we are out of Uwe Boll movies so whose turn is it now to make a video game movie. That’s right you guessed it Marky Mark. Ok maybe he’s only the actor playing our hero but if I had said John Moore (the director) you would have said huh? Anyway pretty big budget, big name actors we will see what happens.
Max Payne is about a cop whose family is murdered Max then moves to cold case department where no information about his family’s death leads him to take on a huge corporation.

So it seems as far as the fans are concerned this movie is split down the middle they either love or hate it I liked it a lot and thought it wasn’t bad. What’s funny is the president of 3d realms who are the production studio behind the game said he hated the movie then when it started making money said he loved it can’t deny the power of money.

So any way let’s run down the list of things that made Max Payne a great game.

1. Intresting dark plot with an old school noir feel to it.

2. Dynamic game play that maid bullet time a staple of game play in many games to come.

3. Well acted and developed characters.

Now how many of these transferred over to the movie? The plot is almost the same they changed a few characters back stories around including max’s but it’s still dark and still just as messed up as the game and the few changes don’t really do anything to hurt the plot in my opinion.

The movies certainly doesn’t revolutionize anything as far as camera work goes but they did use a super fast, 10,000 frames per second camera to film the one bullet time sequence in the movie and that worked really well. And that’s one thing I do like is the fact that while bullet time is prominent in the game using it that much in the movie would not be a good idea so they had one scene as a tribute to the game and it worked very well.

The actors may not have been the best but I don’t have any gripes ever since the big hit I’ve liked Mark Whalberg as an actor and I think he did a good job Mila Kunis felt a bit out of place as an assassin as I’m used to her being in comedy roles but was convincing enough or me.

Now how much does the plot follow the game? Well it hits on the important parts. Max’s family getting killed, his old partner dyeing and him being framed for it, his wife’s company being responsible for the drug and his family’s death and of course the most important part max’s leather jacket.

I do feel as if the noir part of the movie was kind of like an afterthought. In the game max narrates to himself the whole time in the movie he talks to himself at the beginning and that’s about it I think it would have been a bit better with more of max narrating to himself.

With the exception of the two mob families all the major characters where there max, Jack Lupino, B.B., Alex Balder, Mona Sax, Jim Bravura and of course plenty of random thugs who get shot up.

The action scenes are also done well and capture the franticness of when max is surrounded in the game. And the ending sequence feels like a video game with a new set of bad guys popping out around every corner.

A lot of people complained about the valkyrie's saying Max Payne never had demons or monsters but the valkyrie’s are clearly hallucinations from taking valkyr and are symbolic of Max's struggles against his own inner demons much like the nightmare stages from the game especially at the end when max basically tells the valkyrie’s to piss off he’s not done yet.

Overall Max Payne is definitely one of the better video game movies out there fans with an open mind and non fans of the game can enjoy the movie and unless you’re one of the people that hate mark Whalberg then you should be able to enjoy it too.

How would I do it? I would have focused a bit more on making It a noir movie with more narration from max like in the game and maybe just maybe one extra bullet time scene but I’m a sucker for bullet time.

Overall I give Max Payne 8 out of 10 bottles of painkillers. The action was done well they avoided overusing bullet time and they were able to touch the major points of the plot.

The acting gets 7 out of 10. As I said before unless you hate mark Whalberg or Marky Mark as some call him there should be no real gripe here beau bridges was great as the bad guy and ill even admit Ludicrous wasn’t bad and I hate when singers try to act I mean have you seen the sequel to john carpenter’s vampires Bon Jovi killing vampires ech.

The content gets 8 out of 10. We had plenty of gunplay. We got max’s signature dive and we got one hell of a cool bullet time sequence as well as a good chunk of game characters.

The plot gets 7 out of 10. It touched on the main points like max’s families death his partner being killed and his and Mona's relationship the only things it was missing was him being undercover in the mob and him getting guns from the Russians.

So that’s it sorry it’s not as long as normal but oh well. Next time we dig into street fighter the legend of Chun-Li. Will this revamp of the franchise be any good? Will we get hilarious quotes we can use like “for me it was Tuesday.” Or “of course!!!” who knows by find out next time as I wrap up what I will refer to as Vol. 1 of video game movie reviews.

Far Cry

Far Cry

Well it has been a long hard road and I thank you for sticking with me but we are finally here at the last Uwe Boll movie until Blood Rayne 3 gets released god help us on that day. Anyway let’s hope Boll learned from how great he made Postal and Far Cry isn’t as bad as everything else he has done.

Far Cry is about an ex Special Forces member named Jack Carver who is now working as a boat guide. He is escorting a journalist to an island when his boat is blown up Jack then proceeds to fight alongside the journalist to find out what is going on the island. During his stay he fights soldiers and genetically enhanced soldiers with super strength and speed.

Ok well apparently Boll was able to get the rights to this movie before the game was even released so it’s kind of funny it was the last movie to get made did he learn anything from all his video game adaptations well lets dig in and find out.

Now to be fair I’m not even sure if this movie has been released on DVD yet. I downloaded it from a torrent site but I was tired of waiting. According to IMDB the movie was released in Germany but as of yet I’m not sure it has come out here in the U.S.

Anyway the movie and the game start almost exactly the same with jack’s boat being destroyed. Jack, Val, and Krieger are all from the game but the plot is a little less then accurate. In the game Krieger is doing experiments on primates in the movie its humans and in the game Val works for the C.I.A. but in the movie she is a journalist. And this is all there really is from the game but to be fair the game didn’t have much more plot then this anyway.

Now while this movie was way better then everything Boll has done so far with the exception of Postal nothing can ever top Postal. The movie has a hard time deciding what it wants to be at points it’s a horror movie at others a comedy and still others is action. The horror as we can all figure out is Bolls favorite genre and is executed badly it’s cheesy and not scary at all.

The action on the other hand is pretty good. Jack uses Parkour techniques at times to move around the different interiors and it ends up being cool enough and executed well enough to be entertaining. The other action is generic but also entertaining shoot outs, perfect accuracy from the hero, explosions those sorts of things.
The super soldiers are also done pretty good there’s one soldier who breaks his programming and fights the others and the way Boll shoots the super speed parts isn’t bad and over all the action sequences are enjoyable not the best ever but not the worst it’s like watching an old school Arnold movie, as long as you don’t mind seeing the same shit you’ve seen time and time again its watchable.

The comedy is done ok not as good as the action not as bad as the horror. There are a few scenes that are funny like jack trying to explain to Val how to use a grenade while jack is driving a truck and soldiers are shooting at him or when the food delivery guy is arguing with jack and begging him to save his life. It is filled with one liners some good, or at least as good as a one liner can be, some horribly bad.

Overall id say the movie is at least worth renting if it ever makes it over here the action is generic but entertaining enough the acting is ok and the plot is as close to a Far Cry movie as we are going to get.

Honestly I think if people picked games that where a bit more plot heavy instead of games that are popular to make into movies we would get better movies based from our games. Far Cry the game was great because it had stellar graphics, amazing amounts of freedom for its time, and good enemy AI none of that translates well into a movie. When Far Cry first came out you never heard anyone say “oh my god you have to play far cry the story is amazing”. Allow me to give you more examples. Mario bros, great fun as a game, no real plot, horrible movie, silent hill standard survivor horror game play, deep involving plot, great movie.

How would I do it? Well honestly I wouldn’t do anything I don’t think Far Cry should have been made into a movie and what Uwe did is as good as anyone else would have done. Sure if it was a big Hollywood movie we probably would have gotten Hugh Jackman as jack carver but that doesn’t change the fact that the game isn’t good material for a movie.

Overall I give the movie 5 out of 10 super soldiers. The action was entertaining enough to make this a rental whenever it gets released.

The acting gets 4 out of 10. Not to horrible but nowhere near good enough for anyone to care.

The plot gets 6 out of 10. There’s really not much game plot anyway and this gets the main points but like the Xbox version it changes a few things fans may not like.

The content gets 7 out of 10. It has guns vehicles an island and enemies from the game not much more you can expect from a movie based on an fps.

Ok that concludes the Uwe Boll movies yay now other people are free to make horrible video game movies. Up next is Max Payne then Chun-Li I know I have been behind my goal is to pump those 2 out as fast as possible because Tekken hits theaters soon and I’d like to do a review as soon as I see it.

Postal

Postal

So here we are back at Boll. But wait!!! This one’s different. Not only is this a good Boll movie but it is, in my opinion, at the time of writing this thee best video game movie of all time. I know you’re probably saying bullshit but I swear to you. If this review doesn’t convince you then please go rent the movie I promise you will enjoy it. Anyway enough out of me onto the review.

Postal is about a guy whose life is shit. His wife’s cheating on him his neighbors are assholes and he can’t seem to catch a break then well like the title suggests he goes postal and him and his uncle come up with a plan to get rich however during the course of the movie the postal guy has to deal with the police, terrorists, red necks and a religious cult.

Ok so first off let me say this. Postal was made to offend everyone and I do mean everyone. From the president to Osama bin Laden no one is safe in this movie. The movie parody’s red necks, religious fanatics, terrorists, big corporations, bush, news reporters, kids shows, baristas, midgets, and Uwe Boll even makes fun of himself.

Now to give you just an idea about how offensive this movie is I will describe the opening scene for you. We open on two Middle Eastern men discussing how proud they are to die for Allah. However they hit a snag when they find out Osama promised them different amounts of virgins when they get to heaven. So after a minute or two of arguing they call Osama to confirm the amount of virgins. At the end of the phone call they decide the amount of virgins isn’t enough to die over and want to turn the plane around and go to the Bahamas. At this point the passengers break into the cockpit and start to wrestle control of the plane away from the terrorists. The camera then zooms out to a window washer as we see the plane crash into the building the window washer is on and it’s apparent now that it’s the twin towers.

Now if you aren’t offended by that opening then chances are you will enjoy the rest of the movie and there’s plenty movie to enjoy and plenty of laughs to be had but I think that’s enough of me raving about the movie let’s get down to the gritty details.

Like the game Postal is very violent. There is a shootout at the unemployment office, a hilariously named little Germany amusement park, a trailer park and a terrorist compound that used to be the base of a religious cult. There’s also a stabbing of a beggar, hundreds of children die, a midget gets raped by 1000 monkeys, and a suicide bomber blows up a religious nut on a street corner among other things.
As far as likenesses to the game there’s plenty. First off the main character is named postal dude just like in the game also the local convenience store is a hide out for a terrorist cell. There’s a religious cult which is actually just a money scam run by the postal dudes Uncle Dave who is played by Dave Foley. The people making the movie tried to get Gary Coleman to reprise his role from the game but unfortunately he was unavailable but they did get Vern Troyer (mini me form the Austin powers movies) to play himself.

There was a great scene that takes place at an amusement park called little Germany where Uwe Boll makes fun of himself. In the scene Boll is being interviewed because he’s the owner of little Germany and there is a line where he’s asked how he funds his movies and his response is “well many people believe my movies are funded by Nazi gold and well, it’s true” then later Vince Desiderio the creator of the Postal game disguised as a Krotchy doll shoots Uwe Boll in the testicles and blames him for making a crappy movie from his game. As Boll is dyeing he declares “I hate video games” then falls over dead.

The similarities don’t stop there either like I mentioned above Krotchy dolls are a major focus point. The dude’s wife is nagging and cheating on him his dog is also named champ like in the game. At one point the dude uses a live cat as a silencer however unlike in the game the cat lives. And last but not least the end of the movie like the game ends with the apocalypse.

Now the acting is fantastic especially in the case of the actors playing Bush and Bin Laden. I mean it’s a comedy movie so don’t expect jaw dropping dramatic performances but everyone delivers there lines with perfect timing and both Dave Foley who was on kids in the hall for a long time and Zach Ward who was on Titus are veteran comedic actors and it shows. I may be a little bias as I have always been a fan of Zach ward and was super excited he was the postal dude and to be honest I think he looks like the postal dude with the exception of the red hair.

The plot is not a direct retelling of the events from postal or postal 2 but it has the attitude and feel of the games most of this I attribute to the fact that Desiderio was involved with the script and production of the game witch again simply proves my point that if video game companies where more involved with the movies based or three games we would get better quality video game adaptations.
There will be no how I would do it section in this review as I think this movie is perfect the way it is.

Overall the movie is a perfect example of a good adaptation. It has the characters and the attitude and feeling of the game it’s based on there’s all kinds of little things like the cat silencer for the fans to pick up on and if you’re not a completely stuck up person then you can enjoy the incredibly offensive humor.

Overall I give postal 10 out of 10 dead Gary Coleman’s. The movie like I said above is just about perfect in terms of a video game adaptation incorporating lots of stuff from the game including the overall attitude.

The acting gets 9 out of 10. It’s almost perfect timing on all the lines and the writing is so good that even the crappy actors, IE the hot girls, come off as funny.

The plot gets 9 out of 10. It’s not a perfect translation but it is enough like the game that nobody should care and it was good enough that the creator of the game himself allowed it to be made.

The content gets 10 out of 10. Just about every single character or type of character from the game is in the movie.

Well we are now 1 movie away from finishing of the Boll movies and that movie is Far Cry I’m also downloading a copy of alone in the dark 2 however this is simply being produced by Boll he is not writing or directing like the rest of his movies so I’m not counting it as his. After Far Cry is Max Payne followed by the new street fighter both of which I plan to have done in less than a month because in august Tekken comes out and the creators have made a public statement that they are committed to making the best fighting game adaptation yet and promise it will be nothing like the street fighter movies or the Mortal Kombat movies.

In the name of the King A Dungeon Siege Tale

In the name of the King
A Dungeon Siege Tale

He’s back!!! That’s right your favorite director is back with another masterpiece. Oh wait I’m not reviewing a good movie? I’m still doing movies based on videogames? CRAP!!!! That means it’s another Uwe Boll movie doesn’t it? Ok well this movie had a big budget and actors people know so it’s got to be good right? Right?
Dungeon siege is about a simple farmer named farmer whose wife and son are kidnapped when a race of monsters called Krugs attack the kingdom of Ehb. Farmer fights them off rescuing a few people along the way and later joins the king’s army to help fight an evil wizard.

Ok so this time around Boll gets a big budget and what’s he do with it? Hires one of the more popular action stars at the time (Statham) hires a sometimes b sometimes a list actor (Ron Pearlman) and hires 2 ex superstar actors (Reynolds and Liotta) add in one CG and special effects fight scene and a whole two armies rushing at Each other and you get dungeon siege.

Let’s get this straight right off the bat I don’t blame the actors I blame the casting director or whoever is responsible for hiring the actors and choosing their roles. It seems boll just wanted as many big names as possible to try to get people to come see this movie. I mean Burt Reynolds and ray Liotta are good actors but to cast them in medieval/fantasy roles like this is just silly and produced only laughter from me.

Statham is great as always especially since this is a purely action role and that is certainly where he excels. Thank god ray Liotta was the bad guy anything and it probably would have been completely unwatchable. It was hard enough hearing him shout threats about magic. Reynolds isn’t a bad actor but again I just don’t think a medieval role was right for him.

It’s not just the incorrectly cast actors either most of the dialog is just silly even for a fantasy movie. But there are a few things the movie does right. The action is well shot and until the last fight scene is pretty good. In the last scene the movie forgets it’s a fantasy movie and thinks it’s the matrix, With Statham flipping all over the place in an unfitting display of wire-fu.

The other thing the movie does right is the content and story compared to the game and that’s double surprising considering it’s a Boll movie. The story is almost identical to the one in the game and they even went as far as to name the main character farmer witch I think is great. The Krug are from the game and look and act like the digital counterparts as well the kingdom is named correctly as well as the town of stone bridge. Statham even collects party members along the way.

A lot of critics complained about the action being very similar to lord of the rings but I think that’s a bull shit complaint. 300, troy, kingdom of heaven, king Arthur, and Alexander all have army on army action scenes and there were plenty of movies before lord of the rings to have them as well I think this complaint was simply made for the sake of complaining and is another reason I hate professional critics.
And last but not certainly not least Boll again gets the music right. This time going with power metal bands like blind guardian, and Hammerfall. The soundtrack is certainly a treat if you are a fan of power metal and I would suggest it if you’re not but curious as to what good metal sounds like.

So those are certainly the only pro besides the fact that I think Leelee Sobieski is hot. But wait!!! There’s plenty more cons. The story itself while most of it stems from the game is predictable and boring because of the out of place actors it’s hard to care about anyone when the king is poisoned I laughed I couldn’t help it.

I did happen to run into a higher up from gas powered games while working at Comp USA (their offices where incredibly close as where Microsoft’s.) and he told me he was the one of the ones who sold the rights to Boll. I asked him why he would do that and his reply was money. And this leads me to another point.

Videogame movies would not be bad if the companies behind the original game where involved in the production a little more and possibly set certain stipulations ahead of time. More often then not a company collects its cash and could care less how fans of the game feel about how shitty and raped our games get I have two examples for you. The first is silent hill Konami was involved with the making of this movie from start to finish and it turned out great and should have been pleasing to any fan of the game unless they are a fan boy/fan girl who are never satisfied with anything. The second is Max Payne now this is certainly not the worst video game movie in fact I liked it a lot but the coo of remedy entertainment said he hated the Max Payne movie and wasn’t satisfied with it until it started making money then he loved it.

Anyway back to the movie at hand I believe we are at the how I would do it section. And if you haven’t already guessed the biggest thing for me would be casting Statham and Pearlman where fine in my opinion but Liotta and Reynolds definitely not. I would have ditched the matrixesque fight scene in the end for a more traditional one on one possibly giving farmer a few spells considering every class in the game has them that way it could be spell vs. spell sort of thing.

Overall the movie blows, one or two decent performances do nothing to save this movie and the action while entertaining at times is just as bland as the dialog the music is great and there’s lots of stuff from the games but it was almost doomed from the start with Boll at the helm. The good news is after this Boll said he would never again work with a big budget so thank god for small miracles.

Over all the movie gets 5 out of 10 poisoned kings. It does have a lot from the games but out of place actors and passable action pull this one into the mud.

The acting gets 3 out of 10 only two performances where any good and the rest where laughable passable or downright bad.

The plot gets 6 out of 10 most of it was straight from the game with a few minor changes.

The content gets 7 out of 10 a good chunk of classes and races where included as well as locations and monster design and the Krug even said “Krug” like in the game.

Ok another one done and quickly this time mostly because I’m eager to review the next movie on my list witch if you read my top ten best and worst video game movies you would know it is by far the best video game movie ever made and here’s the real kicker it’s another Boll movie. That’s right up next is postal and boy oh boy it is a duzy then on to far cry to wrap up the Boll movies then Max Payne and as soon as Chun-Li comes out ill take care of that one which will complete the catching up and then I’ll be able to review movies as they hit theaters as long as I’m able to see them.

confessions of a media pirate

Confessions of a Media Pirate

So the other day I was surfing around IMDB and found a thread that was discussing pirating aka illegal downloading and the morality of it. Well I am a media pirate. I download movies music video games TV shows and I also copy any movie I rent and enjoy. But what comes next may surprise you. I am not here to defend myself or pirating in general I’m here to let everyone know that me and anyone else who downloads for free is a thief plain and simple.

Pirating has been around for a long time now its older then everyone thinks with one of the very first uses of the term going all the way back to 1703 where a book written by Daniel Defoe was being printed over and over again without him receiving anything for it. Before 1999 pirating was limited to computer savvy people who would use things like Usenet and IRC. Non computer savvy people could find bootleg movies and tapes at flea markets. Then in 99 Napster was created and suddenly getting a hold of pirated material was easier than ever. Napster was eventually shut down but other peer to peer or P2P networks and programs took its place followed shortly by Bit Torrent and its indexing sites.

I have read and listened to numerous arguments for piracy and frankly they are all bullshit. People say it’s there right to listen to the music or see the movie and this is simply crazy. You have no right to use other peoples work whether it be a movie or music unless you have permission from the creators or you pay the money to do so.

Another argument I hear a lot is that the downloader wouldn’t have bought the movie or CD anyway so getting it for free is not hurting anyone. Again this is bullshit it is an excuse to moralize something you know is wrong. If you were not going to see the movie or listen to the CD why download it in the first place? Last but not least the other argument is movie studios/record labels/software companies all have plenty of money and are not hurt financially by the downloader.

This last one pisses me off the most because yes the CEO of a company or the music exec or the actors or directors usually have plenty of money and aren’t going to be hurt by a download. However the guy who sweeps the floor, the lighting guys, the dishwashers, the guys that get yelled at by Christian bale and other low level employees probably don’t have plenty of money and will end up being hurt by your actions.

Then we have the people who say they wanted to sample something before buying it and maybe in 99 that would have been valid but now ten years later there are plenty of legal ways to sample things. You can rent a movie for 5 bucks you can listen to free music via legal sites like Songza. Programs like Veoh and websites like Hulu allow you to see free legal TV and movies.

By now a lot of you are probably calling me a hypocrite and laughing amongst your selves about how stupid I am for bashing pirates when I am one myself but that’s where you’re wrong. I’m not bashing pirates I’m bashing pirates that try and defend what they do morally. 99% of the time downloading stuff from the net is illegal and stealing.

There are a few exceptions where P2P and file sharing networks can be used for good. The first is open source software and free to distribute media. Like 2 years ago Radiohead put its entire album out for free or for you to pay as much as you thought the album was worth. Movies like download this movie and CD's like steal this album are being promoted for you to download or pirate and even if the artist didn’t intend for the media to be pirated if you name your CD steal this album you deserve the consequences.

One other way downloading is morally right and legally is with fan subs of anime. A fan sub is when a group of people take an anime that is only in Japan or another Asian country and add their own subtitles to it. This is the rare example of when torrents and other file sharing tools help an industry. Most fan subing groups will not sub a series any longer if the series has been licensed in America and will then encourage the fans to buy the DVDs and most will. This way of doing things introduces shows to fans and increases fan base thus increasing sales for the actual product.

And if this is how it actually worked with movies and music then file sharing would be great if it was actually possible to see something before it was out and all it did was make people want to buy it more than it would work well but it doesn’t the cold hard truth is pirating is stealing I do it and if you download without paying you do it too.

I’m a pirater and I’m a thief and all I have to say is I hope the FBI never checks my house.

HITMAN movie review

HITMAN

How good can a game about being the best assassin on the planet translate into a movie? Will Luc Besson being a producer help this movie pass the hurdle that so many other video game movies have failed to in the past? Well read on to find out.
Hitman is about an assassin named agent 47 who works for the “agency” and is considered the best assassin in the world who never misses a target. His latest assignment has him killing the Russian president but something goes wrong and 47 is now being chased by his own agency as well as the cops and has to find out who is setting him up before they kill him.

Ok so I haven’t played every single Hitman I played most of the second one on ps2. And from what I’ve found out 47 is a clone in the games and has increased strength and agility in the movie they dump the clone thing and have the agency take in orphans and train them to be assassins.

What I remember from the game is the many different ways you could get to and kill your target. There where disguises, poison, piano wire and of course 47s dual pistols. Now while in the movie 47 does impersonate a person in one scene its more guns blazing action then sneaky spy stuff. However the movie does do a good job of showing off 47’s intelligence and other skills as an assassin.

The action scenes where good they weren’t too over the top and fit within the story nicely unlike other movies where the action seems to be there just to be there. 47, Diana, the agency and agent smith are all from the games. But in the games agent smith is a bumbling fool who keeps getting himself caught while in the movie he is a very competent CIA agent.

Throughout the movie 47 has his signature outfit and pistols. The barcode tattoo is present. His insignia is everywhere and he genuinely acts like 47.

I believe that the movie was able to capture 47’s neutral attitude not caring one way or the other if someone has to die for his mission even a bystander but like just about every other assassin movie it suffers from sudden emotionitis. Sudden emotionitis is when a movie character that at first is shown as ruthless or uncaring about anyone ends up uncharacteristically caring for someone more than they should. The professional, Bangkok dangerous, chronicles of Riddick and the Bourne identity are a few, this doesn’t make them bad movies it’s just a trend that seems to show up a lot.

There is a deleted scene in the DVD that shows the female lead being killed while 47 watches as opposed to the original where 47 protects her from another Hitman. Apparently some of the original scenes hinted at 47 being a clone but it was changed at the last minute and some scenes where reshot.

The acting was pretty good Timothy Olyphant was good as 47 keeping a calm tone even when threatening to kill just like in the game and it was nice to see a bald main character who isn’t Vin Diesel or Jason Statham.

The plot could be a Hitman type plot as far as killing the president and finding out who set him up but the movie dumps 47’s background for the one invented for the film.

Overall this is definitely one of the better video game movies out there the acting and action are great and entertaining and it does a decent job of capturing some of the main themes from the game.

Overall I give the movie 7 out of 10 AMT Hardballers. The action and acting was good the director did a nice job with the scenes and it was an all around decent movie.

The acting gets 7 out of 10. No award winning performances here but decent job all around.

The plot gets 5 out of 10. Like I said not a direct Hitman plot but could very well be however it loses points for dumping the clone story line.

The content gets 6 out of 10. Most major players are here. Hitman's classic outfit is present as are his guns and insignia.

Ok well that wraps up this short and sweet review next we have a bad good bad sequence of boll movies and no the good is not a typo then Max Payne. And somewhere in there will be my review of Boll himself. Then sometime soon I will review Chun Li and in august Tekken hits theaters.

Resident Evil Extinction

Resident Evil: Extinction

Ok well hear it is the third and supposedly final resident evil movie well I’m eager to get this series out of the way so let’s get right down to it.

Ok so at the end of the last movie raccoon city was destroyed by a nuclear missile so what adventures will our characters get into in the mountains is it possible they will visit the facility from code veronica. Nope we jump ahead 5 years to a zombie infested wasteland with a quick intro by Alice explaining that the t-virus has infested a good percent of the population.

So where do I begin well first let’s talk about the plot progression. We go from an ending that copies the third game to the start of a story not present in the game at all. In the first movie we got a sort of side story to the first game in the second movie we had a story that imitated the second and third game but now in the third movie we leave all that behind and get a new story that the games haven’t reached yet and that also fails to utilize 2 characters from the game.

The first of these characters to be used incorrectly is Claire Redfield. At first in the games she is simply looking for her brother then later becomes a very strong willed capable fighter when faced with danger. In the movie they don’t cover any of her back story and now she is leading a convoy that hunts for survivors. The convoy may be something that Claire would have done but honestly she doesn’t do much else sure she fights a few zombies but I honestly don’t think the movie captures her personality very well and this version of Claire could have easily replaced with an original character.

The second character that was not utilized very well is Wesker. In the games he’s a great villain after escaping death in the first game by injecting himself with a version of the t-virus that gives him super strength and agility much like Alice's powers in the movies. If they had covered a tiny bit of his back story he would have made a great opponent for Alice with their abilities being very similar the ending battle would have been great and probably something similar to the fights in code veronica. Instead they let him be a strictly behind the scenes bad guy who is high atop umbrellas ranks.

Now honestly I think the movie handled the tyrant monster pretty good. In the games tyrants are constantly changing and developing new abilities so it makes since that this tyrant would have similar abilities to Alice so the fight would be interesting.

The action sequences are entertaining and pretty good. However more so then the second one this movie has even less horror aspects to it. At least in the second one while they are in the church and school there are moments of suspense and surprises but here there’s really nothing there’s one scene where a zombie comes out of a closet but other than that 2 second jump scare there’s nothing. Even when our heroes are being rushed by a hoard of zombies you don’t fear for them at all.

I think the main reason for this is how powerful they made Alice she is super strong she’s faster than normal people more agility and has psychic abilities. Which is another thing at the end of the second movie Alice’s powers have developed quite a bit but in this one which is 5 years later they are just starting to develop subconsciously it just doesn’t make since to me.

The ending of the movie does set us up for a sequel but there’s 2 things wrong with this one there has been multiple occasions where its stated that this was the last movie and 2 if they continue this plot line it won’t just be one Alice it would be an army of them and Alice is already strong enough having hundreds of her seems stupid.

Besides Claire, Wesker, and tyrant there’s nothing else from the games like the first one this is an original story which would have been fine if it was supposed to be after the games but the fact that they made it go in the direction it did does not help the series at all.

How would I do it? Well If I was going to simply alter this plot I would have made Wesker the main bad guy. If I was going to do my own movie I would have tried to do the story from code veronica which would have used both Claire and Wesker in better roles.

Over all the movie has decent and entertaining action sequences but fails to deliver in anything else and I’m glad it’s the final in the series so we don’t have to deal with the mutilation of the resident evil franchise anymore.

Overall the movie gets 4 out of 10 zombie crows. Entertaining action and pretty good CGI is the only redeeming factor for this movie other than that it’s really not worth watching.

The acting gets 6 out of 10. Like I said it’s not horrible just nothing too special.

The plot gets 2 out of 10. It took the franchise to a time and place it hasn’t hit yet and unfortunately the story just doesn’t deliver.

The content gets 4 out of 10. I really liked tyrant and it was nice they tried to include Wesker and Claire but the way they used these famous characters was poorly executed.

Ok well I’m glad I was able to get this one done as quickly as promised in my last review. Up next is Hitman then three Bolls in a row. I will try to pace myself with these as I do not wish to explode anyone’s head. However once I finish these that will conclude the Boll movies and I will be able to start writing my review of Boll himself.

And after that its only 2 more movies until I’m caught up and I have 4 months to do all this in as in august the Tekken movie comes out and I’d like to review it as soon as I see it. I hope the DVD for Chun-Li is out by then because I’d like to re-watch it before I review it.

BloodRayne2 movie review

BloodRayne 2: Deliverance

Ok so about a year after the first BloodRayne we get its straight to DVD sequel. This time Rayne is taking out vampire cowboys in the Wild West can a new actress and new setting save this series or will it be just as pointless as the first. Well read on to find out but I think you know the answer.

BloodRayne 2 takes place in a small town during the Wild West time era. This time Rayne has to take on a vampiric Billy the kid who is rounding up cowboys and turning them into vampires and children for some reason or other.

Well BloodRayne 2 does absolutely nothing to help this series at all the new actress is simply there for her looks where as at least Kristina Loken had martial arts and fighting experience. The best part about the first movie, the gore is absent in this one.

Again the movie is not based on either of the game stories and again shows Rayne's past which is fine. I actually liked this story better then the first as far as writing goes because it doesn’t change the facts about Rayne’s life it’s just an adventure she had during her long life.

Zach Ward is decent as the vampire Billy the kid but I’m a bit partial to him ever since the sitcom Titus. The new Rayne is bland as well as the supporting actors and actresses. The movie isn’t paced well at all and has even less action sequences then the first and like the first it fails to capture Rayne’s true powers.

There’s a scene where Billy is holding a weight or something above a child’s head and threatening to release it. Rayne should have been able to use her speed to slice Billy and catch the rope I mean in the game she can dodge bullets. She does catch the rope but it is with a great deal of effort.

Other than that there’s not much more to say the movie is just a continuation of the crappy Uwe Boll movies and is even worse than the first one as it’s missing the only good parts from the first one.

Overall the movie fails harder than the first to deliver a good BloodRayne story or even a good b vampire movie the lost boys 2 is a much better straight to DVD vampire sequel.

How would I do it? I would dump the Wild West and like the first one id actually put her in ww2. I have heard there is going to be a third one that finally gets to the stories of the games but we will have to wait and see.

Overall I give the movie this movie gets 2 out of 10 Dhampir blades. It’s just as bad as the first if not worse

The acting gets 2 out of 10. I like Zach Ward but that’s about all only good thing is him being in this movie probably helped him get the role as the postal dude.

The plot gets 1 out of 10. It’s just a side Rayne story and has no bearing or plot elements from the game.

The content gets 1 out of 10. Nothing but Rayne is from the games.

Ok so that’s out of the way a quick short one for a crappy movie up next is the last resident evil then Hitman then back to boll with his first big budget film and as soon as I save and post this I’m going to start on the resident evil review so expect them within hours of each other.

top ten movie sequels

Top 10
Movie sequels that where better then the original

Ok so in this list we are tackling part 2’s that where better then the part ones as always these are my opinions and if you disagree I’m sorry but make your own list.

10. Matrix reloaded. Now I know I’m going to get a lot of flak for this one. A good majority of the people I talked to loved the first one but hated the second. But the list isn’t based on sales numbers or anyone else opinion. Why do I think it’s better than part 1? The action scenes are longer and mixes the gun play as well as the martial arts scenes the story reveals a lot more about the one and is a lot deeper than good vs. evil and the smith vs. neo scene is one of my all time favorite fight scenes.

9. The incredible hulk 2008. Now I’m not sure if this is meant to be a sequel or if it’s a reboot or what but it is the second hulk film in the new generation of super hero movies so I think it counts. The acting is a lot better the story is more like the comic the hulk is more like the hulk and iron man is in it you can’t get much better than that. Also the movie is paced better and they even let Lou Ferrigno does the grunting and growling for the hulk.

8. Clerks 2. Some of you may agree some may not but clerks 2 was raunchier then the first and was absolutely every bit just as funny. The amount of time between movies does nothing to hurt the film. The interaction between Dante and Randall is absolutely great and seeing jay and silent bob back in their roles as supporting characters fits them well yet again plus who could hate a movie with a donkey show in it.

7. Superman 2. The second superman movie is better than the first for a few different reasons. For starters it’s the only superman movie where superman fights a super villain form the comic besides Lex and not only is it one villain but 3 and for an older movie the flying super human fights, while not a huge big drawn out cg effect like the matrix revolutions, are pretty good and he uses a cellophane s as a weapon that’s freaking cool.

6. Indiana Jones and the temple of doom. I’ve always liked temple of doom better then raiders I don’t know if it’s the fact that I was a young boy and this movie was full of gross out scenes including the bare hand removal of a guy’s heart. And short round is great as the comic relief albeit slightly annoying at times.

5. Aliens. More Ripley, more aliens, and more action are the main reasons this sequel to alien make it onto the list plus we get the “leave her alone you bitch” line while Ripley destroys the queen using the lifting mech thing.

4. Predator 2. Yes I know Danny Glover is no Arnold but honestly what’s so special about a Special Forces solider beating a monster he’s trained and buff and ready to kill. But Danny Glover's character is an older plain old cop and he still beats the predator. Not only that but this movie is the one that first introduces us to the fact that the predators have fought the aliens before and we get to see more about the predator technology and more predator equals better movie.
Ok these last 3 are big ones and depending on what kind of movie you are a fan of you may completely agree or totally disagree but in either case here are the top 3 sequels that are better than the originals.

3. Terminater 2: judgment day. The first one was great but with the second one we get 2 cyborgs not just one we get to see Arnold as the good guy and we get some very cool CGI effects with the t-1000. This is also the first time we get to see how much Sarah cares about john and this movie establishes her bad ass status that we have all come to know and love.

2. Star Wars episode 5 the empire strikes back. This is one that a lot of people agree on we get to see Yoda for the first time. The love between Han and Leia grows and Luke matures more into a man. And last but very certainly not least we get one of the greatest twists in cinema history when Vader reveals he is Luke's father.

1. Batman: The Dark Knight. Batman begins was the restart the franchise needed to dig itself out of the whole that batman and robin dug itself into comic and movie fans alike enjoyed this new origin story of batman. It was darker and with the explanation of most of Batman's technology we got some answers we may have had for a while but skip ahead a few years and everything is better and bigger. We get more gadgets we get to see the mental struggle between batman and Bruce Wayne and of course we get one of the most disturbingly wonderful performances from Heath Ledger as the joker and in my opinion the best joker of all time. Everything in this movie is well executed although a few of the lines are cheesy. Everything in the dark knight tops everything from batman begins in every way and that’s why it’s my pick for number 1 sequel.

Ok I hope you enjoyed that list I know some will agree and some will disagree but it’s my opinion like anyone’s else’s top ten list. I would love any comments and will respond to them all.

Dead or Alive movie review

D.O.A.

Ok so at this point we have a mortal kombat movie and a street fighter movie so the next logical step is the dead or alive series. Will this series do any better than its fighting game adaptation brothers? As always read on to find out.

D.O.A. or Dead or Alive is about a tournament of the world’s greatest fighters hosted by Victor Donovan. Over the course of a few days the fighters compete in single KO elimination contest. Towards the end the final 4 find out Donovan has other motives and the fighters have to compete against him. There are a few sub plots going on as well. Christie and max are trying to find a vault full of money. And Kasumi is trying to find her brother while avoiding Ayane who is after her.

Ok so D.O.A. is the third movie based on a fighting game and personally I think it’s the best out of all 3 in the next few years we will get a Tekken movie and an art of fighting movie so time will tell if it holds its place. Now you’re probably wondering why I like this one best so let me get into it.

First off it’s the plot. Now it doesn’t follow the games exactly it gets the main gist correct. Instead of a huge corporation trying to make the ultimate weapon its one man trying to compile all the fighter's data to make a program which is essentially the same goal.

Other things that are nicely done are a lot of little things such as the health bars when Donovan is watching the first round fights the computer voice saying “ready, fight!” Which is from the game. There’s a scene where 4 of the female fighters play volleyball while Zach, another fighter, does the commentary and this is a fan service reference to dead or alive Xtreme beach volleyball. What’s good about this scene is they do not just focus on the fan service there an action scene that cuts in and out of the volleyball scene.

Another thing that’s cool is the amount of characters. Now unlike in MK2 they decided to focus on only a few characters and just write the others off as fighters in the tournament instead of trying to make them intricate to the plot and most of which are defeated and therefore sent home early in the movie.

That’s another thing the fighters are mostly in traditional out fits from the games and easily recognizable by fans and most are introduced by name at least weather it’s the health bar or contest bracket or during the scanning scene. However the characters are not all done well there’s a few tradeoffs I’m not to fond off.

First Zach’s personality is dead on but except during the warm up montage he doesn’t do any Muay Thai moves, which is his fighting style from the game. The Kasumi Hayate and Ayane relationship is correct but they grossly overuse the word Shinobi in the wrong context. In the movie they use shinobi to describe a rouge ninja the real use of shinobi is just another word for ninja.

Donovan’s character is mostly correct with a few minor details changed. In the game he is head of DOAtech in the movie he’s head of the D.O.A. tournament. In the game he hires Ayane in the movie he does not. In the game and the movie he is responsible for Helena's mother’s death.

And of course there’s Christie in the game she is a ruthless assassin but in the movie they make her out to be a fun spirited thief only mentioning her assassin status in text.

The acting is only ok some of the banter is funny such as bass walking in on Tina in situations that make it look as if she is a lesbian to him. Also it was kind of neat how a real wrestler (Kevin Nash) played bass who in the game is also a wrestler.
Now what’s a movie based on a fighting game without fighting so let’s talk about that. The fights are very well choreographed witch is no surprise as the director is Corey Yuen who has directed some other very good martial arts films including so close, the enforcer, and the first transporter. One of my favorite scenes is when Hayabusa is fighting the guards on his way up the stairs it’s so brutal and fast paced.

There are also some well placed comedic sound effects like when Leon pumps his arms they make gun cocking sounds and during Tina and Zach’s fight when they hit each other tiny explosive noises can be heard.

Over all the movie is a pretty good kung-fu flick and does well as a video game movie it has recognizable characters as well as a plot similar to the games while only changing a few minor details but not deviating to far from the objective of the plot.

How would I do it? Well besides the character changes I mentioned I would pretty much leave it alone.

Over all the movie gets 8 out of 10 Shinobis. The movie succeeds where other video game movies fail including recognizable characters and a ton of tiny little things from the game and it’s always the little things isn’t it?

The acting gets 6 out of 10. It was horrible but most of the actors just phoned it in and there was a bit of over acting.

The plot gets 7 out of 10. The end objective is the same as the game and most details are the same but they also change a few characters a bit towards the bad side.

And the content gets 8 out of 10. Lots of characters lots of little things from the games and it’s the first fighting game movie to sneak health bars in there.

Ok that’s done next up we get back to the crap fest that is Uwe Boll with Bloodrayne 2 a straight to DVD pile of vampire turd. I have obtained a laptop recently so I will be able to complete these reviews faster now. After Bloodrayne 2 we finish up the resident evil series then on to Hitman followed by 2 boll movies in a row. See you next time.